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Posts Tagged ‘miscarriage’

>No Longer Valid

>I lost the baby. He was about 12 weeks when it happened. We went in for an ultrasound for dating purposes. The tech was very quiet, and wouldn’t answer any of our questions. When she was done, we were shown to an exam room where the doctor came in, announced, “Your pregnancy is no longer valid,” and walked out of the room. Just like that. Bam. No longer valid. Like your password expired, or you put in the wrong PIN at the ATM.

Well, shit. There it was again. My old friend failure. We had been reacquainted nicely a few months ago, and it seemed he wasn’t quite ready to leave yet. I failed at being a good wife; I failed at being a mother at all. I could feel the fat bubble getting thicker in hopes of better protecting me from the rest of the world. After a while, it started to work.

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